So I was seeing this girl Blair. Blair and I had ridiculously good chemistry. To be honest, I don’t know what happened, but one night, we both were having fun and I was exhausted after work. I was exhausted, but glad it was a Friday.
She was being herself, had on this effortlessly sexy, paper thin, white dress. It was a casual dress… the kind that looked like it could slip right off.
The second I saw her walk into the restaurant, my brain couldn’t help notice how hot her tan legs looked. Everything about her was just so sexy to me (and all the other guys in the restaurant, who were clearly unable not to notice this blonde bombshell walking as if she didn’t have a care in the world).
She saw me and excitedly walked over quickly, sat down and smiled.
She sighed a little.
“Oh, Eric… it’s good to see you. I’ve missed you, to be honest.”
She bit her lip. I was losing my mind, in the meantime.
She just kept looking at me. I have never been so turned on in my life.
She got this look on her face that made me even more curious about what she could possibly be thinking.
She wasn’t talking as much as she usually did, but I could hear her breathing heavily.
We got through a quick dinner like this. It was so much sexual tension exploding, but neither one of us acknowledging it, which made it even more insane.
Finally, dinner was over. My place was nearer than hers, because she was in the area for work and we had agreed to meet up after.
We got into a cab.
She sat extremely close to me, and I could hear her breathing getting heavier, and as I got closer I could practically feel her heart pounding.
Her lips looked so delicious I felt like I was hallucinating.
Note: this is why it’s so important to create as much build up as possible with a woman. It drives her absolutely insane.
Blair was shifting her legs, looking restless and she sighed again. God, she smelled good.
We were about a minute away from my place, when she leaned in and got closer to my face.
We weren’t talking. Words weren’t necessary by that point.
For at least 50 seconds, she seemed to be trying to contain herself, but something else overwhelmed her and she pressed her lips against mine.
That was a kiss that made me feel something I’d never felt before. I’d been with a lot of women by that point and let me tell you… when you have a “kiss” with a woman you end up making your girlfriend, it tends to have a certain quality to it that normally isn’t there.
I grabbed her hand and guided her out of the cab, which she didn’t exactly mind.
She whispered into my ear, “Eric… I’m so wet.”
She grabbed my hand, placed it right on her vagina.
She just put it right there to let me feel her through the thin panties she was wearing.
Let’s just say that night turned out to be the ultimate sexual experience of both of our lives.
The Key to Getting Physical With Her
One of the biggest problems the guys I coach have is about that first kiss. We’ve seen it immortalized in every other movie, T.V. show and even cartoon. (Yes, think about it, all those Disney cartoons are building up to that big kiss between the hero and the damsel in distress).
If you’re not sure and can’t quite tell if the feeling is right, hold off. The only reason you should ever hold off is if you’re really unsure about whether she’s into it or not.
If you feel the chemistry; you’re having a great time and laughing and talking easily, DO IT!
She wants you to. Have those mints on hand because after a night of talking and possibly eating or drinking, it doesn’t hurt to have a minty fresh first kiss, instead of a beer or sushi-breath kiss.
A great moment to do it is when she’s leaning in and you’re talking. Maybe there’s a brief silence. You can tell by “that look”. She’s looking you right in the eyes and she is close to you. If she is standing off a bit and not giving you that direct eye contact, don’t do it.
Sometimes she might be nervous and won’t look you straight in the eyes, but if she’s close to you that’s a great sign.
This is one place where movies can actually help you. It sounds silly, and you’ll probably not admit this to your buddies, but look up “top 20 movie kisses” or even “top 100” if they have it. Watch those clips (I’m talking about looking it up on YouTube, which is probably the most convenient way).
See that look all women give before the first kiss? There are a few subtle variations, but you will see that head tilt, that dreamy look. She is comfortable and expectant. Let her have what she wants.
If she’s just being polite and more formal in her attitude, lay off. It doesn’t mean it will never happen, but now is not the time. Forcing a kiss when she isn’t ready will ruin any chances you might have had for a future kiss. She will lose any sense that you have a connection or that you understand her.
Flirting means you are going to make eye contact, look her directly in the eyes and see how she reacts. If she smiles and puts her head down, she’s shy and most likely turned on. If she looks back at you, she’s getting in the moment herself. Here is one rule to remember: always go by what she is doing when deciding what to do next.
Never just act according to your own rulebook in your head without making sure it’s matching with her in that specific moment.
The feeling you are going to create is a sense of “urgency.” She is going to want to have more of you because you will leave the date on good terms, make it so that she is the one who is eager and dying for more of that kiss you hardly gave her.
When you kiss her, step back and end the date soon after. Here is what will happen if you get the timing right. The kiss will make her feel “starry eyed,” which is female code for, “very turned on, desperate for more physical contact and shocked at how desperate she really is.”
When you kiss her for the first time, make it short.
When you touch her for the first time, keep it quick and light.
When you tease her, give her a little, but cut it off when she needs more to feel satisfied.
This applies to all things you do in the beginning with a woman because she ends up taking what you give for granted if she is always able to get a fix whenever she wants.
End the date with a kiss on her cheek, brush her hair away from her face or some kind of gentle touch like putting your hand on the small of her back and then stop yourself from giving into anything else.
Women can base a lot off a first kiss, so make it count. She will get an instinctual feeling about your sexual compatibility from it. If you give her some terrible messy kiss and invade her mouth forcefully with your tongue she won’t want to have sex with you or see you again. Let her take the kiss to the next level.
Keep it simple, as with many things you’ve learned. When you have that moment, linger a bit. Don’t shut down like a robot. Let the moment before the first kiss last a little. That builds up the anticipation and optimizes the chemistry between you two.
Don’t make it a long kiss; it should be a short, but sweet, direct kiss. Like I said, don’t be forcing your tongue into her mouth that first time. Let her feel the sweetness and passion of that first kiss. She will want many more believe me.
If you’re in a situation where you’re making out with her, kiss her on the neck lightly and sweetly. Women love the feeling of a man’s lips on their neck. You can kiss her in other ‘’sweet spots” too if she is letting you (her thighs and on her chest).
Being able to kiss her great in common ways, but also finding other spots will build an incredible sexual energy between you two and she is likely to want to have sex with you.
Orgasm on Command
This course gives you a fool proof way to make her have an orgasm every time you have sex. The actual techniques aren’t covered in this book, but Orgasm on Command goes through all you need to know in a clear, simple way that will give you confidence in your ability to perform.
Now, this section will focus on other parts of sex that will be what pushes her over the edge and makes her want to be your woman.
Rule #1: Make Her Want It
First, you have to make a woman want it. When you are building up to sex through great kissing/making out, you are letting her build up the desire for sex. Don’t be the one to start pushing it there, let her build up the desire so she gives you very clear signals she wants you. Letting that intimacy brew is going to lead to great sex for her.
Rule #2: Gradual is Key
A slow, gradual build-up is what’s going to get her boiling over with passion and make her animal side come out. Don’t ever go from 0- 60 mph because women don’t get turned on as fast as men do.
If you “go for it,” and try to force it to happen in a sudden, dramatic way, you won’t turn her on the way you would if you made it gradual.
Gradually turning a woman on means lots of foreplay. Lots of foreplay will warm her up and make her crave you more and more. The time she spends craving you is directly related to how turned on she becomes.
This is Completely Her Choice
When you want to have sex with her, the only thing you can do is respect her choice. You are NEVER entitled to having sex with somebody because you paid for dinner or because you had a steamy make-out session.
She has to choose you, and when she does it’s because she CRAVES you. She wants you bad and knows it.
If she ever feels pressure she won’t be able to enjoy the moment at all. She absolutely won’t orgasm and you will both be left feeling bad. And don’t expect her to want to do it again. You will have ruined all the mojo she was feeling before.
Good sex comes from allowing her to build that feeling of intimacy and passion and craving. A great environment and a great time together will start to build that feeling. You’re creating anticipation in her, and that is the most powerful thing you can do to lead to really mind-blowing sex.
Forming that intimacy with her is easy. Have that great time together; great conversations where you open up about each other and get below the surface. Don’t list off personal things, allow them to naturally come out in the conversation. Both of you will be sharing and getting to know each other on a deeper, more intimate level.
Getting this level of intimacy is activating all those chemicals in her brain and body that make her want to get physical with you. When you keep the pacing casual and have those great, mutually revealing conversations you’re feeding that intimacy premium unleaded.
As I’ve said before, women are completely different from men in so many ways. What arouses them is no exception. A guy sees a body and a face he likes and that is practically all it takes. Aside from if she is completely insane, he wants her. In fact, if a beautiful woman approaches a man for no strings attached, random sex, very few men will ever pass the chance up. Women couldn’t be further from that.
They thrive on nonverbal cues. Looking into her eyes deeply and giving her that sense of comfort and familiarity will let her know she has your full attention. There have been countless surveys done over the years and women universally agree that giving her your full focus with eye contact gets her fired up.
You can create intimacy with the things you say even when you’re not around her. Sending a text that says, “thinking about you” or “you’re on my mind” or “you make me smile” will drive her wild.
She knows she has your attention and that she has an impact on you aside from just making out or being right there with her. That gives her feelings of intimacy a huge boost.