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In 2016, the year to come, learn how to master your text game by following these 10 base tips:
1. CONTEXT IS EVERYTHING
Do not stack the texts one after the other machine gun style in hope of something sticking because that’s not going to work. You need to come across as natural as possible and not sound like a copying and pasting robot. Know that it’s not only what you say that matters but also the context in which you say it in. I will explain what the correct context is to use with each technique so you know exactly how and when to use them.
2. KNOW WHEN TO STOP
Avoid texting her too much, especially in the beginning. Your attention should be earned gradually over time and not given automatically. Find the right balance between texting them enough to create intrigue and then leaving them wanting more.
3. NO DOUBLE TEXTS
If she hasn’t replied to one of your texts do not fall into the trap of texting her back the same day. Do not begin to doubt what you wrote. Your mindset should be that she is testing your neediness so don’t give her a reason to lose attraction. If she still hasn’t responded after at least 2 days, open her again.
4. VARY RESPONSE TIMES
Don’t be predictable, vary your response times. Sometimes it’s fine to text back immediately, though if you’re busy then make her wait. The general guide is to mix it up so she that doesn’t know when to expect your response.
This rule does not apply if you’re in the middle of a conversation where not responding would destroy the momentum of it or if you’re arranging time dependant logistics so gauge it accordingly.
Don’t overthink it when it comes to how long you should wait before texting her for the first time, though it’s better not to wait any longer than a day so that the interaction is still fresh in her mind.
5. DON’T ALWAYS RESPOND
Do not respond to every text. This may seem hard at first and counterintuitive though you will quickly begin to realise how effective it can be. It will also give her space to miss you.
The best time to leave her hanging is when she asks you a question and not during a lull in the conversation because now she’s expecting a response and not just assuming that the conversation ended naturally. This makes your non- response much more powerful. Text back in 1-2 days picking up where the conversation left off like nothing happened. Do not apologise for or explain your absence.
6. PRACTICE INDIFFERENCE
Indifference is attractive. Be completely indifferent to all responses and outcomes. Never show anger over text or any strong emotion for that matter. Showing that kind of response means you’re attached to the outcome and that you think your life would somehow be better with her in it. Your mindset should be that her responses don’t affect you because you’re fine either way. Also avoid sending overly serious texts, texting should be fun and lighthearted so try to keep it that way.
7. AVOID BORING TOPICS
If it’s not interesting then you shouldn’t be talking about it. Don’t try to get to know her over text and avoid asking facts about her or what she’s doing (save those for in person). Topics to avoid include work, news, personal facts etc. You won’t be able to completely avoid some of these topics entirely and that’s okay just don’t make them the focus of the conversation or go out of your way to introduce them.
8. STOP TRYING
A conversation should flow naturally with a similar amount of effort from both sides. If you look at your recent texts and see that you’re the one asking all the questions and doing most of the talking then you need to take a step back and assess what you’re doing. Try to avoid sending long texts, most of the examples I provide here are one sentence or less (usually around 5-10 words is more than enough).
The use of emoji’s will allow you to get away with much more than you usually could and can be the difference between texting something that could possibly offend her and texting something that will make her laugh. Without the presence of vocal tonality and facial expressions, texts can be taken in different ways (especially if she doesn’t fully understand your personality yet) so it’s important to use emojis to show that you aren’t taking it too seriously. They will also allow you to replace overused acronyms though remember to avoid overdoing it and keep it simple, that means no girly hearts or kiss emojis.
Looking to take your text game to the next level?
In it you can find the exact text messages, and the system he developed, over nine years of sending thousands of texts to hundreds of girls. No matter what you’re struggling with right now, he’s probably got the answer to it.